April 2010
1 post
les.
hold hand. kiss.
everything looks so peaceful and pure.
love between two girls
cant ever get over with.
even as of today.
theres always gonna be some moments to grief
theres always gonna be some years to miss someone
quietly love you
quietly miss you
till i quietly forget you
because were les. i can give you the happiness a guy cant give.
because were les. i can give you the...
March 2010
1 post
i run away when im sad. push everyone everything away. when i realize that it really doesnt bother me that much i regret the things ive done. then i see the things that made me upset. feelings r still clear. emotions come and go. i dunno if things i say make any difference. at least i said it. i dont wanna care about the outcome. i dont know what i want. since its not always gonna come true. i...
February 2010
4 posts
I'm dying/styling my hair tomorrow.
trianglesex:
phnaw:
RED!!!
trianglesex:
Should I go platinum or red or dark ?
Thanks, robin bobin. Jack’s the only man for me too. Ahh, rhetoric.
omg!! i want this color tooooooooo!!!!!!!!
看到你們照片的那一刻 我懂了。
我知道 你真的沒有在乎過。
就讓你 消失在我的世界吧。
January 2010
1 post
December 2009
21 posts
need someone to tlk to.i cant deal with anything anymore.its so hard to pretend im fine and try to b happy all the time. im not as strong as i think i am..i dunno wut to do..i dunno how i can take all the pain away.full of bitterness.wish i can just rip it out of my heart..i thought the hardest time was over.
its gonna be 00:00:00 after 3mi…all i can say is tmr will b better:)
cross my...
one of the worst days.
so i was sitting on the train after tlked to lydia thinking nothing cuz couldnt think of anything. completely blank..went to target. got wut i needed. wondered around.ipod started playing “lydia”.blanked out. pulled out my ipod switched a song. another sad song..just as i started feeling lost i saw two skateboards..fml.
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuckfu ck fuck fu ck fu ck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fkfck fuck fuckf uckf uck fuck fuck fuck !!!!!!!!y did i tlk to her? fuck fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfcukfuckfuckfuckfcukfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuc!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
freeeee!!:D
friday!!! haha done with skool for the yr!! :))
obviously just woke up.haha happy happy :D
the blur makes me wanna see it clear
but just when i reach out
i open my eyes
the feeling of loneliness give me a shiver
the sound of someone shoveling the snow
all the furniture seems to be in the wrong spot
and so am i
what’s real?
the blurry feeling the blurry things
what’s next? am i real? what happens after this?
the scratch on my arm
the L on my body
the ring in my...
phnaw:
its about us. i hate it. but i can’t stop...
“my life is so peaceful without her. i love my peaceful life.”
same ppl same convo different answer at different...
A month ago…
“when r u coming to ssa?”
“dont wanna tell u”
“y?”
“so i can surprise u :D bt i nvr see u when i come”
“well.bt if u tell me. then ill make it happen”
______________________
now…
“so when r u coming to ssa again?”
“Y?”
” just asking”
” y do u wanna...
“The best way to get over a woman is to turn her into literature”
i always said she lived in her lies.
bt now im the one whos living in the lie
i always thought she misses me and know im the best
bt the truth is she hates me and nvr want me back
i always said i dont want her back
the truth is i miss her tons
i pretend to be mean. tht way she wont know how much i hurt
i tell myself im happy. give myself smiles and say its not a big deal
it really isnt.
i...
mmmmm get blamed on things i did do..awesome.i guess thts a good thing sometimes..dont wanna explain much..its still my fault in a way i guess..wutever
cant believe shes tht protective of her tho..everything she said is bullshit..fuckin lies!!
bt thx for leaving.
cuz my life is better without her
:)
when this kind of feeling occur, i always need to tlk to someone..not cuz i want them to pity me or anything..i just wanted hav someone there..so i would know im not by myself..tlking to my friends in china is making me feel a lot better..they kno me the best..no culture difference..they kno wut im tlking about..the only thing is they dont really know wuts going on here..so its hard for them to...
“if i cant delete u off of my heart..then everything is pointless”
– Jessie
November 2009
53 posts
看到你的照片怎樣都沒辦法生氣或是對你凶。為甚麼就不能好好的。真的很喜歡你可是只能討厭你去騙自己說你不值得。。希望時間可以快點過。希望每天起來想的不會是你。希望一切都是一場夢。更希望從來沒有愛上你。。如果當初多聽朋友的話現在就不會這麼痛了。。不管怎麼做。受傷的都是我自己。。傷害你我會痛。看著你幸福一樣會很痛。我到底該怎麼辦。。胸口被石頭压著一樣喘不過氣。以為自己很堅強。。以為自己不會再為你哭了。。可是現實的殘忍往往讓我難以接受。。你比誰都可愛卻又比誰都可恨。我失去的回的來嗎。恨你帶給我的痛苦。有一天你會付出一樣的代價。淚流滿面的說我是最棒的。
bored.bored?bored!
haha bored out of my mind..
feel like my life is almost back to normal now :)
prob cuz im not so worried bout skool
or mayb..mm..i just dont care anymore..
bt somehow i thought bout my first kiss with X
then i thought bout normally i was always waiting for my phone to ring around this time
i dunno since when i stopped carrying
i dunno since when i can sorta control myself on a boring...
had bout an hr of sleep last nyt. tired as fuck just an hr ago..so i fell asleep in the couch..10mi later, according to my mom, i had this image of erica in my mind and all of the sudden i got scared opened my eyes and cant fall back asleep again..
idk y this kept happening to me..not like im thinking about it bt i jus wake up like this every morning..and i havnt even took a nap in a long...
so bored.not gonna sleep tonight.laptops outta battery.too lazy to move.umm.its hot in my room.i think im tired.bt just dont wanna g2 bed.couldve took my chem quiz.totally forgot.omg its getting hotter.i think its the laptop.idk if my brain can eventually stop thinking if it got too tired.i would luv to see tht happen.i think this is stupid.bt kinda fun.idk wut im doing.but just feel like doing...
happy ending - mika
“Life is a bitch…because if it was a slut, it would be easy.。！”
“i always feel a rush of disappointment when my phone goes off and it isn’t...”
always wondered how i became an alcoholic
AIM IM with WilliesBunny11/25/09 7: 15 PM
williesbunny: ebay
jessie: ?
williesbunny: are u ok?
do u want me to sleep over?
jessie: im ok i think
williesbunny: well...
im comming over
i dont believe u
jessie: ...
its nothing big
williesbunny: u dont want me to come over?
jessie: if u want to hell ya
williesbunny: what happened?
jessie: hangon..im in middle of something ryt now
williesbunny: ?
jessie: hold on ill tell u later
give me like 10mi
williesbunny: i dont have 10 min
jessie: ...
ok
williesbunny: what are u doing?
jessie: typing something
williesbunny: ooh
jessie: its ok
williesbunny: hmm
jessie: its not a big deal
williesbunny: well can ur mom buy us wine? \
and ill bring a movie
jessie: we hav a lot at hoome
williesbunny: a lot?
enough?
jessie: - -then u better bring ur laptop
williesbunny: cuz i drink a lot
jessie: oh ya
we hav A lOT
williesbunny: ok lol
ill bring a movie
and ill call u when im there
dont be sad
WILLIES COMMING

jessie: yayy
williesbunny: see u when i get there
jessie: k
williesbunny has gone offline.
felt sorta a relief..
bt heart sorta intertwined
suddenly glad u left
bt wish u didnt take everything away with u
it simply is just not fair
wish it was just another nightmare
or just a sad story i read
except everything was so real
i couldnt let it go like tht
no matter how long it has been
everything is real
the stairs u walked on
the chair u sat in
the bed u lied on
except i cant...
“everything was beautiful and nothing hurt..”
